Saturday, November 12, 2011
Sunday, November 06, 2011
Grant year, week 44: back to work
I've just started polishing the second draft, I'll probably end up changing enough to call it a third draft. :)
The break has been longer than intended, for a range of mostly boring reasons. But looking on the bright side, the extended break will give me a bit more perspective. Just 20 pages in, I've already noticed this. I thought the first 50 pages were pretty solid, but already I've found quite a few typos and clumsy language.
Which brings me to my next point. I don't know what it's like for other writers trying to 'break through' but I find I vacillate between frenzied terror brought on by the fear that I'm missing opportunities ALL THE TIME and lethargy/apathy, thinking that there's no way I'm going to 'make it'.
Somewhere is the sweet spot, where I get my best work done and manage to not make irrational decisions that may damage my real opportunities.
I've been thinking about submitting Skin Deep to the Pac Mac Manuscript Monday, but I want to make sure I send them something that represents the best writing I'm capable. At the back of my mind is the frenzied terror guy, screaming that they could close subs AT ANY MINUTE... but I'm trying not to listen to him. If I send them something crap, it will do more harm than good, right?
However, at the other end of the scale is the guy that's telling me there's no point subbing anything, anytime -- because I suck. So, at some point, you have to make the decision that it's as good as it's going to get, and then send it out. Because if you don't send it out, they can't say 'yes'!
I'm still fairly happy with what I've achieved this year. The schedule has slipped a bit. But I'm still hoping to have something halfway decent in the hands of my beta readers in time for Christmas holidays.
Friday, October 28, 2011
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Brisbane Zombie Walk 2011
I actually wasn't intending to go this year, because every year I try to go, something happens and then I can't go.
But of course, I didn't plan to go, so I found myself not only free this afternoon, but also in the Valley.
Here's some photos...
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Macabre: out now on ebook
Macabre: A Journey Through Australia's Darkest Fears features a whopping 205,000 words of Aussie horror -- the classics (Henry Lawson, Marcus Clarke), the modern masters (Terry Dowling, Kaaron Warren), and some of the nicest people I know (Stephen M Irwin, Shane Jiraiya Cummings and the rest of you... you know who you are!).
Oh, and if that's not enough for you, my short story about the dark heart of journalism 'Feast or Famine' is in there too.
When I first held Macabre in my hot little hands at WorldCon last year, I remember thinking, 'This is awesome. This is massive. What's the shipping cost going to be on this thing?' So it's awesome that it's now being offered as an ebook, so that this weighty tome can be offered without the weight.
It's currently available at Smashwords and Amazon, and will be available elsewhere before Halloween.
And, if you still decide you want the brick, I'm told POD versions will be coming soon.
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Grant year, week 41: 1st rejection
Well, I didn't get into the Hachette MS Development program. They had 260 applications, and from those chose 10 to take part.
I have to admit, it knocked me around for an hour or so. But I've bounced back well. I think in part because of this article by Tobias Buckell, where he talks about 'milestones' and 'goals'.
Milestones are things you’d like to have happen to you. Selling a story. Selling a novel. Getting nominated for an award. Winning an award.
Goals are things you can actually achieve. Finishing writing a story. Writing a certain number of words. Writing a certain kind of story.
And...
Early on in my career I hit upon a method of focusing and rewarding only the activities that I could control. I knew I wanted to sell a story, but that it was a random pellet. So I focused on writing and submitting stories. No one could stop me from that. I celebrated every 100 rejections (with champagne and nice food and a little mini-celebration) I got as proof that I was laying down the right actions toward hopefully getting a story sold.
So, even though the rejection was initially painful, I'm still on track to reach my goal -- to have a polished MS by the end of the year.
Where do I go from here?
At the moment I'm in the process of printing out the second draft to send back to the editor and also to an early beta reader.
After that, I need to polish, and then send to a couple of other beta readers.
Then a further run-through of the MS to incorporate feedback.
And then I just have to sell the damn thing!
The other thing that's helped me keep my chin up is attending the Emerging Writers Festival yesterday.
I got to catch up with writer/editor friends, and the festival itself resulted in some interesting ideas/opportunities.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
The process of writing — Speakeasy
I used to be very much seat of the pants but I generally like to have an idea of how the story ends these days.
I had too many experiences where I had 2/3 of a story but couldn’t finish it. And for novels—I definitely plan. Even though pretty much everything ends up changing.
I think you’ve got to have a plan, but be flexible.
That’s how it is for me, anyway!
Sunday, October 02, 2011
Grant year, week 39: 2nd draft finished!
Well, kinda. I think it was Trent Jamieson who said that the rewriting is finished when you run out of time. So, I think I would like to rewrite the epilogue, if I have time.
I've been really slack with my updates on the blog. Apologies for that. The reality is that there hasn't been a hell of a lot of news. I've been slowly plodding along with what I'm calling my 'continuity sweep' of the second draft. I rearranged so much, structurally, that I needed to go back and make sure that it all made sense.
And it did, pretty much. There's one thing that's niggling me, so I think that means that it's still not quite right. But I feel like if I had to send it off to the Hachette thing tomorrow, I'd feel okay about it. And I'll only have to send it off to the Hachette thing if I get shortlisted. Which, obviously, I hope will happen.
So, from here. I'll probably give myself a night off tomorrow. (I'll most likely still be writing, but just not working on Skin Deep). I've had some ideas for the follow-up book. One of which, bizarrely enough, came from my daughter. She said that she'd seen mandarin skin on the nature strip outside the house. She said maybe it's a burgular.
It got me thinking about a guy who's under some kind of magic spell and the mandarin is some sort of hypnotic prompt. He's out there, watching, quietly eating his mandarin. I don't know. If Skin Deep is anything to go by, by the time it reaches the book, it will bear no resemblance!
Anyway, next steps are to send the second draft to a couple of people who have offered to be early beta readers (if there is such a thing) and also the editor, who has kindly agreed to have another look.
And then hopefully, if I can iron out this final problem, it will just be a text edit and it will be good to go to the second round of beta readers.
Woohoo!
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
From the archives: 2009 interview with Sara Douglass
Q. Fantasy seems to be going from strength to strength while other speculative fiction genres (with the exception of supernatural romance) still 'struggle' - what's the appeal of fantasy?
I have to come at this by saying I don't read fantasy myself and haven't for about 15 years (if I write in a genre I can't possibly read it) but from things my readers have said, it provides a sense of adventure and romance that simply isn't readily available in real life.
Q. Can you tell me a bit about your latest book, The Infinity Gate?
Dear heavens - I wrote that when I was feeling really ill and then my world fell apart entirely, so I am trying to remember back through the fog of pain and illness! It is the conclusion of the Darkglass Mountain series. I am not too sure what I can say without revealing the plot, but we get an appearance by Axis' long-dead (or so he thought) half-brother Borneheld, even more Icarii get killed off, and Ravenna (almost) redeems herself. But the major surprise in this book is the Skraelings - they finally reveal who and what they really are and <em>do</em> redeem themselves!
Q. In late 2008 you were diagnosed with advanced ovarian cancer. How has this affected both your approach to writing and how you feel about the writing itself?
I was pretty stressed writing The Infinity Gate and was thinking I needed a whole heap of time off but how can I do it - then I got the cancer diagnosis and realised that if I didn't take a year or more off then I would die. Fortunately a couple of years earlier I had taken out income protection (I cannot recommend this highly enough) and I received a huge payout - so now I am free at last! Free at last! I can escape writing for at least a year! I needed a break so badly and the best thing that the cancer did was a) force me to take it and b) give me the money to do so. So I am taking off for as long a I can - writing was getting too stressful and I need a big-time break from it.
Q. I've heard from other fantasy writers that making a career out of it really can be like 'stepping on the treadmill'. Was this what it was like for you and, from the point of view of unpublished writers, do you think it's a cautionary tale (not getting the cancer, of course - more about being careful what you wish for)?
Yes for me taking on writing as a career was definitely stepping onto the treadmill. When I was writing for fun and working elsewhere, writing was my escape from work. It was enormous fun! Then I began writing as a career and it became 'work', and yes it becomes as stressful as other careers. It was no longer fun. I really, really needed a break. I'm not too sure how to escape that treadmill - I really admire any writer who maintains the level of fun for their writing as they did when it was a hobby and not a means of living.
I also found writing fantasy peculiarly stressful as you are so often trapped into writing trilogies - instead of being able to embrace new ideas each year for a new book you're trapped into the same project for years on end - I have grown very, very tired of that. I am reading a series of crime novels at the moment - they've gone on for 20 years and I really admire that author for being able to stay with the same characters for 20-odd years and still maintain interest and verve and freshness in both characters and writing.Q. Could you see yourself just giving up writing entirely? Or, at least, when you get back into writing, doing it more on your own terms?
Yes, I can see giving up writing - writing does not define me, so I don't 'need' to actually write. But on the other hand I can just as easily see myself producing the odd book occasionally and really enjoying it. I don't think I will ever, under any circumstances, do a trilogy or series of books again. I just don't have it left in me, and I don't want to commit to that level of writing (and stress) again, but I can see myself doing stand alones every so often. I am also keen to try different genres - I would love to be able to slip into historical romance at some point. But going back into writing will be more on my own terms rather than on other people's - be they publishers or readers. I think I want to do what I want to do, now. And who knows what that will be? :) Overall, however, I am going to give other areas of my life much more attention and time. Writing will take a third or fourth seat.
You can join Sara Douglass for a live chat from 8am (AEDT) today. Go to the Flycon home for more details.
I thought I'd post this in case anyone would like to read it. I didn't know Sara but she seemed to have her priorities straight.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
September 11
When the September 11 attacks happened I was living in the UK. I was at HTML training course that day. The trainer said, 'Okay, now open a browser window and go to the BBC website'. There was a screengrab of the twin towers, smoke billowing out of them. At first it seemed like a sick joke. And then we continued our training. No-one really understood the enormity of it. I don't think anyone could really believe it.
My (now) wife and I were booked to fly to New York the following week. (We ended up going in October. It was the first time I'd ever been scared of flying, and that fear persists to some degree even today. There were US flags in virtually every window. Lower Manhattan stank. I was surprised at how up-beat New Yorkers were -- they were getting on with their lives).
We came home to the share flat we were living in that evening and the TV was on, and those same pieces of vision playing over and over again. The second plane hitting. The towers falling. I still think no-one could believe it.
I was part of an online writing group back then. I'd entered a short story competition and I won. On September 10 I posted in the forum. Topic: 'Has the world gone mad?' The words had a slightly different meaning a day later.
The events of September 11 had a lot of us questioning what we were doing with our writing. People (including myself) wondered whether we should be writing such dark stories, when the world seemed so dark, all of a sudden.
When I told that story when I was on a horror writing panel at Conjure in 2006, someone in the audience said -- I can't remember her exact words, but the gist was that the lives lost in the September 11 attacks paled into insignificance compared with lives lost in the third world (or maybe she was referring specifically to the ensuing wars in Afghanistan and Iraq). And I couldn't answer her. I couldn't articulate what it was about September 11 that made it different to all that other death and suffering.
Over the past could of weeks I've been working on the ABC's '9/11 Remembered' coverage. And I think that this is the first time I've really reflected on the events of September 11.
The thing that really gets me is 'Day before the storm: photos from September 10, 2001'. The photo I've used above, by Mike Horan, is a perfect example. On September 10, 2001, people were just going about their lives. Mike, like probably thousands of people that day, posed for a photo in front of the twin towers.
"...the date has the appearance of a timer counting down the dying moments of an old world since replaced by the tense and paranoid world we live in today"
Who would have thought that those towers would be gone less than 24 hours later? There's so much melancholy in those photos. They raise the question of 'what if?' over and over again.
That resonates with me because I'm fascinated by stories about the small choices people make, and the impact those choices have on their lives.
The other reason September 11 had such a massive impact because it was carnage on an untold scale, live on TV... and it was spectacular. The second plane hit when cameras were trained on the twin towers due to the first impact.
Anyway, it's been quite a rough seven days, to be honest. I keep thinking about all those people who died. People who just got up to go to work and never came home again. People who were faced with the choice of being burnt to death or jumping out a window. And I also think about the terrorists who carried out the attacks, and what sort of lives they had, that they decided that's what they had to do to make a difference.
I keep seeing the twin towers in my mind. Thinking, 'what it?'.
Thursday, September 08, 2011
The day before the storm: Photos of Sept 10, 2001
Here's a poignant look at the events of Sept 11, 2001. The photos and stories of people who were there the day before.
There's also a Flickr group: http://www.flickr.com/groups/daybeforethestorm/
Monday, September 05, 2011
Sunday, September 04, 2011
Grant year, week 35: tunnel vision
Tunnel vision is what I wished I had. It's what I'm aiming for. Not quite achieving.
I've been working on some prep work for the ABC's '9/11 Remembered' coverage. It has been really engrossing work. It has also affected me emotionally. Reading first-hand accounts of people who were in New York City and Washington DC on 9/11. Also reading some background published in the years after 2001. Like 'the jumpers', which I'd somehow forgotten about (or maybe blocked from my memory).
Towards the end of last week I was feeling a bit freaked out. I decided that I probably need to vent, by writing a short story. Which I can't do at the moment because I need to stay focussed. Now that the grant is over, I don't have that safety net that allowed me to follow (writing-related) diversions. The only time I have is in the evenings, after the kids are asleep, and maybe a bit of time on the weekends.
There are things I'd like to do. I'd like to enter another manuscript into Pan Mac's Manuscript Monday.
I need to critique the last act of a friend's manuscript.
I've also got a growing urge to start work on a totally unrelated MS. This thing would be deadly to get into. It's alt-history, set in the 80s, and would require a lot of research.
It's probably the worst possible thing I could do at the moment.
Sounds like I'm having a whinge! I know pretty much all writers face the same issue, daily. Finding time to write. And dealing with the fact that no matter how much time they can find, it's never enough!
Anyway, that's where I am. Now, back to work on the 2nd draft.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Grant year, week 33: unscrambling the egg
This is a momentous day -- it marks the last of my official 'grant days'. I still owe the grant some time (from where I was on a grant day but then ended up having to look after sick kids etc), but in terms of actual grant money, it's all gone.
Do I regret taking three days a fortnight? Do I wish I could have a 'do over' and take a block of three months? Not really. I think the project gained something from having day-to-day stuff filtering into it. It took longer but I realised that although I thought I'd 'planned it out' the planning was only fairly superficial, and I needed that time to work through some of those issues.
And I still am working through some of those issues! The past fortnight I've been working on Skin Deep all day, every day (save for a few days where the kids were sick). At the start of the year, I wanted to have something structurally sound by this point. I'm not quite there, but over the past two weeks I've been working with the editor to resolve some structural issues, and I think that the book will be better for it.
At the moment it's... well, you know when you set to tidying study/junk room. One thing leads to another and you find yourself, in the middle of the day, with a room with all the cupboards empty. Piles of rubbish near the door. Stuff you want to keep but aren't sure where to put it in another pile. Books stacked up beside the bookcase in the rough order you want them. You know that eventually things are going to work out. You know pretty much exactly where you want everything to go. But in that moment, standing in the middle of the room that looks like a bomb has hit it, it's a little bit daunting.
That's where I am now.
I think that at the start of the fortnight I had a manuscript that was okay, structurally. But what I have now has the potential to be so much better. It's going to take me a bit of time to get there, but I'm confident I will get there.
I realise that this isn't the most efficient way of writing. But I've learnt lessons along the way and I've also learnt things about my book that I wouldn't have if I'd written it faster. There are happy accidents that occur when you decide to rip out a storyline, or merge two characters, or keep the core of a scene but change the setting. Ideas collide in ways you never would have thought of.
I'm still aiming to have something structurally sound by early October. Something that's worth sending to beta readers by early November at the latest.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Grant year, week 32: editing
I decided to take a two-week block of time off my day job to work on the second draft. This hasn't worked out as well as I thought it might, but there's been at least one major breakthrough that has made it worthwhile.
We've been hit by sickness, which has meant that writing days have had to be postponed. So I haven't got as much done as I would have liked to.
The editor and I have been batting emails back and forth. The editing process hasn't been exactly what I was expecting. I've drawn a parallel with what I thought counselling would be like, and how it actually was. Before I went to counselling, I thought I would go in there, tell the counsellor all my problems, and then the counsellor would say, 'You've got to do this, this and this'. In reality, counselling (well, my experience of it anyway) is more about being asked questions, and then talking through it to find your own solutions.
And this is how editing has been. So many questions. There were the questions the editor asked. Things that didn't make sense to her. Some of these I knew the answers to, but many I hadn't even thought about. And then there were the questions that these questions raised. Writing is like making a whole heap of decisions. Each decision takes the novel in a slightly different direction and closes off the other alternatives. You start with a book where pretty much anything can happen. But by the start of the third act, you have to tie up all the loose ends and deliver the pay-off.
At times, I thought the questions would never end. But I reached a point where all the questions related to one particular storyline. And I looked at the storyline and realised it was hardly attached to the rest of the book at all. So... the storyline has got to go! (Although, I may build it into book two).
And this is the other aspect that I've found working with an editor helps. In previous projects, I've found that the tendency is to pretend these problems don't exist. I have talked myself into believing that the gaping hole/elephant in the corner doesn't exist, and that if I could just paper over it enough, no-one would notice. But editors notice. That's their job. And so you admit that the fault is there and get on with fixing it.
I don't know if I'm going to hit all my deadlines this year. I still want to have something structurally sound by October, in case I make the cut for the Hachette thing. But I'm less confident the book is going to be of 'beta reader' quality by that point.
I would still like to have Skin Deep in the hands of beta readers by the end of the year. Some lovely summer reading for them!
Tuesday, August 09, 2011
London: recollections from a decade ago
(Photo: Hozinja/Flickr CC BY 2.0)
About 10 years ago my wife and I lived in London for about 18 months. For much of that time we lived in Bow, in the East End. Even back then London in general and the East End in particular seemed in decline/in decay and it there was the general impression that it wouldn't take much to prompt a complete breakdown.
In the middle of winter, we'd often have groups of teenagers huddling in the damp, freezing stairwells of the estate we lived in, and I can remember wondering what sort of home life they must have for this to be preferable. And not just home life. There must've been literally nothing else for them to do.
There was a general feeling of apathy at one end and fear at the other. Any attempts to improve the community were quickly quashed. We lost count of the number of times the glass was smashed out of the phone boxes on the edge of our estate, until they just didn't bother trying to fix it anymore. Someone tried to open a slightly trendy cafe across the road, and within a day someone had smashed the plate glass windows. After it was fixed, the glass was smashed again. The cafe closed down shortly after.
One night, my wife was walking home from the tube. She saw a group of kids (early teens) trying to smash a light in a railway underpass. She asked them to stop doing that. They followed her home, yelling abuse at her and joking that they should rape her.
Whenever I tell people this story, they remark that it wasn't a smart thing to do, telling them to stop. And maybe not, in the context. But maybe if more people stood up to these kids, London wouldn't be where it is now. You should be able to try and maintain order in your community, without fearing for your safety, right? Londoners are relying on the police now, but clearly that's nowhere near enough.
Another time, my wife was on the bus and there was this old woman yelling abuse at a black man. Really nasty stuff. And everyone just sat there, staring down, not wanting to get involved. It took my wife to say something before anyone else would.
Shortly before we came home, one of our flatmates was mugged on the steps, coming up to our flat. They stole her Christmas shopping. She made a complaint to the police. Our flat was egged. A brick went through the window. I don't know what, if anything, happened to the muggers. But whatever it was, it certainly didn't make us feel any safer.
The thing was, we could leave any time we wanted. There was this guy on the next floor up, he was in a housing commission place. He had no choice. He was stuck there.
And I think about those kids, sitting in the stairwell. Trapped there. Nothing to do. No options. Living in a community that's falling apart and that's not going to get any better.
What have they got to lose?
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Grant year, week 30: the unknown unknowns
Still working on the second draft. Focussing on two structural issues this run-through: merging two characters and also restructuring the opening of the book, which has flow-on effects. I'm also noting any loose ends that need tying up (there's a few of them).
Due to the restructuring, I've had to write some 'pick-up scenes'. I'm taking that term from film-making, where it refers to scenes that are shot after principal photography has finished.
One of them is a back story, and it got me thinking of that old Donald Rumseld quote:
[T]here are known knowns; there are things we know we know.
We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know.
But there are also unknown unknowns – the ones we don't know we don't know.
Writing one of these scenes made me realise how little I knew about the subject matter. Luckily I had some great reference books at hand.
At this point my goal is to have a second draft done by early October. And then, depending on the quality of that draft, send to beta readers that same month.
Still confident that I can have something polished by the end of the year.
I've also been thinking more about the follow-up book, which is tentatively titled 'Dark Matter'.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Grant year, week 29: starting the 2nd draft!
I met with... I'm tempted to say 'my editor' but I better not because I'm not paying her anything (yet)... I met with a friend who's doing WEP out at UQ. She had kindly offered to do a structural edit on Skin Deep and this week we met for the first time since I handed over the MS.
It was quite daunting, giving Skin Deep to someone to read, knowing how rough it was. We had a great discussion and between us have come up with some concrete ideas on how to make Skin Deep a better read. It was so good having someone who is intimate with Skin Deep, to bounce ideas off (and also to have an outside perspective on it). I don't know how keen Claudine will be after the 1000th email starting with 'What do you think of...'
Since then I've been beavering away on fixing some pacing problems in the opening chapters and also merging two characters. It's quite complex work. You shift a chapter and then of course there are multiple flow-on effects. It's challenging but also rewarding. I was saying to my wife that (and I don't know if this is all writers or just me) sometimes you know that something needs to be changed but the tendency is to try and avoid it, and tell yourself it's okay. I don't know if this is just laziness or what! But when you finally bite the bullet and start making the changes, it's really invigorating seeing it all come together.
I'm swapping chapters with a writer friend of mine, which will be great because we're both aiming to have our second draft finished by early October (in case we make the cut for the Hachette MS Development program). So that should help me stay on target to have something polished by the end of the year.
If I don't make the cut, my plan is to give the MS to two or three 'beta readers', with a view to having a polished MS ready for agents/publishers by the end of the year.
It feels so good to be back in the saddle.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Monday, July 04, 2011
Grant year, week 26: getting back on track
I went to State Library on Friday, to do some research on the back story. Nothing major. I just needed to have a look at some archive stuff from 2008 and see what was happening in the news then.
I spent a good ten minutes beforehand, out the front of State Library where the buses stop, crying my eyes out. I don't know if I mentioned it here, but Mum got to read the first draft of Skin Deep before she died. She liked it, but she found it hard to follow all the characters. Which was a really astute observation, because I'd also arrived at the same conclusion. There are too many characters who don't really do much. So Mum was my first beta reader. :)
To be fair, the dearth in activity hasn't been all down to Mum. I lost some writing days before she died because the kids were sick. So I've deferred those writing days. It's tricky, because obviously with a grant you don't get 'sick days' or 'personal leave' days. I have to make up those days from my annual leave. But because I've gone part-time, the annual leave doesn't accrue as quickly.
Right, I'll stop whinging now.
Yes, I've had a break. And now I'm fired up. Not just for Skin Deep but all the next projects. I can see three, possibly four, Harry Hendrick books. And there's also a sf story set in Reagan America.
Looking through the microfiche was really interesting. I haven't done that since working on 4157 a few years back. Yes, you can look up news stories via database search. But if you're looking for the general feel of the time, nothing beats microfiche.
The downside with microfiche is that, I don't know if this is everyone, or just me, but I get motion sickness from watching the pages scroll through! (I get the same thing when I was Prezi presentations).
But it was worthwhile. I'd forgotten some of the things that happened, even though it was only three years ago.
I've also got another project I'm working on. I've been sworn to secrecy. All I can say is, watch this space!